How many women do you know who sold all they had and gave to the poor, embracing a voluntary life of homelessness and material poverty for almost fifty years? Who, instead of sleeping at night, carried stones for the construction of a church in a graveyard, and then for a few hours lay down to sleep in said graveyard? Who was gifted by God with something like what we might now call extra-sensory perception, which allowed her to find a companion for a recently widowed man and a parent for a newborn orphan?
St. Xenia is a one-of-a-kind woman, but she was not always that way, at least not to outer appearances. She was born into a family of the lesser nobility, and married a colonel in the Russian Army, Andrei Fyodorovich Petrov. Her life was essentially what we would now call middle-class. After marrying, she was expected to have children and raise them in the Church. However, Andrei and Xenia had no children, and when Xenia was only 26 years old, Andrei tragically lost his life at a rowdy party, without recourse to the Holy Mysteries of Confession and Communion.
This event seemed to flip a switch in Xenia’s mind. Her relatives thought she had gone insane when she began wearing Andrei’s army coat and demanding to be called by his name. (She would continue to do these two things for the rest of her life). They were perhaps even more concerned when she sold all of her possessions and gave the proceeds to the poor. However, when they had her brought before a magistrate, he determined that she was, in fact, of sound mind. Xenia then disappeared for eight years, before reappearing in her home city of St. Petersburg.
At first, when people looked at Xenia, they saw a homeless, perhaps crazy woman. Some boys would mock her and throw rocks at her. But her time away—many believe it was spent in a monastery learning the art of prayer—had deepened a prayerful and loving spirit within her, filling and radiating out from her. Xenia would not retaliate against the insults, but rather, over time people began to notice that when she entered a shop, it would have a successful day, or when she rode in a carriage, it would also do prosperously.
Xenia had become a new creation, she had become a saint. She developed close relationships with many people, “setting the lonely in families” (Psalm 68:6) through her gift of clairvoyance. Seeing in her mind’s eye that a carriage somewhere had overturned and a pregnant woman had fallen out, given birth, and then died, Xenia sent a friend, Paraskeva Antonova, to check on the newborn baby. Paraskeva could not find any relatives for the baby, so she ended up raising the child as her own. Another time, Xenia saw somewhere, in her mind’s eye, a young man weeping as he buried his young wife. At the moment, Xenia was visiting a home in which there was a young unmarried woman. She told the woman, with characteristic pithiness: “Here you are drinking coffee, while your husband is burying his wife at Okhta.” The young woman went to the Okhta cemetery, where she met the young man, comforted him, and went on to become his second wife.
All of this is to say nothing of the selfless devotion with which St. Xenia continued throughout her life to unite herself to her late husband, praying for him and doing good works on his behalf, and hoping in God’s mercy for him despite the unfortunate manner of his death. In Orthodoxy, we often speak about the mystical connection between all human beings, especially as we offer one other up to God by means of prayer and sacrifices. Many saints have written about this, but one in particular stands out to me. St. Porphyrios of Kafsokalyvia, a saint of our time, said:
I love the whole world as myself. Because of this, I see no reason to say: “Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on us” and not “have mercy on me.” Because the world and I are one and the same! Thus you say: “have mercy on me.”
Even so did St. Xenia practice and deepen this unity which God had given her in the sacrament of marriage, remaining faithful to her husband in the extreme and going so far as to die to herself and live “his life,” repenting on his behalf, by calling herself Andrei and dressing in his clothes.
Perhaps these stories about St. Xenia are what encourage many young Orthodox adults seeking a partner in marriage to turn to her for her intercessions. This is how I initially became close with St. Xenia. There exists a custom to pray the Akathist to St. Xenia every day for forty days, asking for her assistance in finding a spouse. She is also invoked by those seeking a job, as well as a place to live.
If we stop to think about this, how incredible is it that we ask a homeless person for help finding a house and a job? That we ask a widow for help finding a spouse?
Nevertheless, this is how God works. And as I have grown to know St. Xenia over the years, I find that it is her incredible warmth and love that enable her to transcend what I would be tempted, in her place, to give into, which is resentment and envy. Why does she get to live happily ever after in a comfortable house? Why does she get a husband who loves her and a job that suits her? And yet, St. Xenia provides all these things to us with a joyful and cheerful heart—herself all the while choosing to sleep alone under the sky.
Her selflessness extended also to her physical labors. A stone church was being built in a cemetery dedicated to the Smolensk Icon of the Mother of God (read my article about another icon of the Mother of God here), and at night when she thought no one was looking, Xenia would help drag the stones where they needed to go, before collapsing for a few hours of sleep towards dawn.
St. Xenia is a true example for Orthodox womanhood. Like any wise woman, she built her house1, but having no earthly family, she built one for the family of God. Like St. Morwenna before her2, Xenia was not afraid of hard labor, still less afraid of what others thought about her. Instead, she cared about their well-being, far beyond her own. Her name literally means foreigner, stranger. She is incomprehensible to our mind, but knocks at the door of our heart. Like Mary, the Mother of God, she wants to show us the way, to show us how to trust everything to Him, even when it seems we can’t get by, we have nothing left. And this is why we love her, we thank her, we will always remember her, and always tell her story.
St. Xenia died at the age of seventy-one, after forty-six years of loving others and her God in the trenches of homelessness and material poverty. She is very much alive and well in heaven, and answers the prayers of anyone who calls on her with faith.
Blessed Mother Xenia, pray for us!
We have no photographs or realistic paintings of St. Xenia, but icons strive to pass down recognizable qualities of the person they depict. St. Xenia is usually shown with scraggly gray hair and a cane, wearing her husband’s army coat. Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons by “Ikonopisnaya Masterskaya Eleon.”
Resources
My main source for the life of St. Xenia is Encountering Women of Faith, Volume I, edited by Kyriaki Karidoyanes FitzGerald.
If you would like to get to know St. Xenia more, or if you would like to request her prayers and help finding a spouse, job, or place to live, you can purchase the Akathist to St. Xenia here. You may also listen to an audio recording here.
For Californians or other local people: There is a skete (monastery) dedicated to St. Xenia in Wildwood, CA. I have never been there, but you should be able to arrange a pilgrimage by calling ahead.
For liturgical folks: St. Xenia’s memory is celebrated every January 24. What do you think would be a good way to celebrate her? Drop your ideas in the comments!
Please share in the comments:
Is this your first time getting to know St. Xenia? What stood out to you about her?
If St. Xenia is an old friend for you, please share a story of her intervention in your life.
The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands. (Proverbs 14:1)
Another woman saint who built a stone church with her own hands, in Cornwall in the 5th century. You can read about her life in the excellent book, Seven Holy Women.
Fascinating and beautifully written. Admittedly, I'm not familiar with many saints, so I love hearing from others their own findings, research, and affinities. What a woman!
Im a catholic but have known about st xenia before i even became catholic. I ask her to pray for me alot and can just say i feel strenghtened by her intercession. Thats a miracle unto itself, but ive never done a novena for a special intention. Thanks for this excellent post!